A love letter to thinking big

 

To thinking big,

 

I might be exposing myself here, but that’s fine. Do you know that feeling, the moment you are alone turning on your favourite record and either sing or dance (or both) to it as if nobody is watching? All the energy you give flows right back to you as some kind of positive wave and you don’t care that it’s not perfect or might not look good. How amazing would it be if you would have that feeling more often? If you would have that feeling when people are around? When people could see the happiness or positive energy it gives you?

Sometimes it feels as if we are scared to show what brings us happiness. We are scared that we are being judged, but in the process, we are breaking our own heart over and over again.

I’ve done this more times than I can count. Growing up I started to rethink and overthink every little thing. Would it come on to strong if I said this? Would I be seen as arrogant if I said this? Would they still like me of I told them this? In the process I packed away all the dreams I might have had, somehow thinking that it was selfish to even have them. You are blessed if at some point you find kind of a non-judgement zone within those dreams. Or at least a zone in which you feel like you can handle the judgement, because judgement is and will always be a part of life.

 

A couple of years ago I would have said that unfortunately I learned how to be alone, how to be lonely. Now I can tell you with all my heart that I’m thankful to know that I’m okay with being alone (or lonely for that matter). I know that I’m strong enough to make it on my own emotionally, that I can get through it because I’ve done it before. I’m incredibly thankful for the people who enrich my life and my life wouldn’t be the same without them in so many ways but I know that my emotional welfare doesn’t depend on them. This knowledge only makes their presence even more important to me. 

 

The first time I found these truly non-judgemental zones for me was at concerts, and until this day it is still one of the many reasons why I love them so much. Another way that I found in which I really start to bloom or open up is through traveling. To me it is a way to get out of my comfort zone and it shows me that there is so much beauty to be found in our world. Both are things in which I’m not afraid to say that I want more, I want to explore all the possibilities they have to offer. This can be used on so many parts of my life, and a big part for me is to be able to share this with other people.

 

I was talking to a friend the other day; we were talking about the future and about what we hoped would be part of it for us. I started to talk about travelling, about how I love it at the moment and in my “private” life. But I also said that I would love for it to be a (big) part of my future career wise.

The thing is, the future is unpredictable, but if I don’t dream and think big and don’t even say these things out loud I for sure won’t even come half way.

 

And I’m telling you, it is not selfish to want more or to think big! Something that took me way too long to realise. Yes, I’m very grateful for everything I have and every possibility and chance I get. I try every single day to not take things (and life) for granted. But it is okay to look further than where you are right now. It all comes down to balance in a certain way.

 

I know people that go into a tunnel vision when looking at the next steps they are going to take, they only look into one direction and need to get to the furthers possible point at the fastest pace. They are living towards an illusion; they think that they will be happy once they accomplished one thing or once they have this or that in their life. Newsflash, they won’t feel pure happiness, because they will never be satisfied. They won’t be able to see beauty in the little things, because they are stuck in this tunnel vision.

 

It is about finding the right balance, with everything in life really even though I know how vague that might sound. I’m telling you now, I’m not afraid anymore to say that I dream big, and so should you. But even more important is working hard towards those big dreams and remembering that each little step counts. I’d even say it might start with dreaming big, but it all depends on thinking big.

 

I’ll always be grateful for what I have and I’ll always try to see the positive because that is part of who I am, but I’m also proud to say that I think big. Even though I might not know how I’ll get there yet, that’s okay. Because even if you have the whole way planned out you can be sure that life will give you a different road that you will take.

I once heard someone say that you should always dream and think bigger than what’s realistic, because the moment you are being realistic is the moment in which you stop yourself from believing in yourself. And I whole heartly agree.

 

Love,

Anna