A love letter to missing

 

Dear missing,

 

Where do I even start with this topic? I don’t want to get to the obvious parts of missing something or someone. So, I’ll try to just write what comes to my mind and we will see where that brings us. Because ‘missing’ is a broad subject, there is so much to say and yet it feels as if words fail to do so. Maybe because ‘missing’ in general is not a tangible subject or maybe because we as humans often are too afraid to talk about it, because it would put us in a pretty vulnerable place.

 

If you think about it, it is absolutely crazy how one moment can make sure that you start missing something for the rest of your life. Missing sometimes becomes a habit and I haven’t found out yet if that is a good of a bad thing honestly. Maybe missing is part of that feeling that you feel when you are not necessarily sad, but you just feel really empty.

 

Many people always talk about FOMO, apparently the fear of missing out. A little later people started to talk about JOMO, the joy of missing out. Fortunately, I personally don’t experience FOMO that often. I love a good night out or going to many amazing concerts don’t get me wrong, but I’m also very content with nights at home where you just relax and have no other obligations. To me that content feeling goes hand in hand with the joy of missing out. Sometimes it doesn’t matter what the moment is, but is it in the people you spend it with that you wish you could stop the time in exactly that moment. Just because you already know, that you’ll miss the moment as soon as it is over.

 

To give you an example, if we are lucky, we experience this with people we meet as well. They come into our lives and if we open ourselves to let them in, they leave footprints on our hearts and we are never the same again. You can find beauty in this feeling of miss; we can find love in it and we can look at it from a different perspective. As Winnie the Pooh said “how lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard”. That is exactly the feeling that makes missing something or someone worth it, because you know that you care, you love and you are alive.

 

Missing kind of is like grieving, it comes and goes in waves. Sometimes it just hits you out of nowhere and it can be like a rollercoaster with all its ups and downs. What makes it hard as well is feeling helpless in many of these situations. We want to do something we want to understand. On one hand we want the realisation to be there, but on the other hand we don’t want said realisation to come because it will only make the ‘missing’ harder. However, we know that the realisation is going to come and it will be there, we can’t avoid it.

 

Ed Sheeran says in his song ‘Supermarket flowers’: “A heart that is broke is a heart that’s been loved”. This can be used in so many different situations that are hurtful to used. Hurt sometimes is a reminder that love was and is always there.

My tears will come and go, wounds will be there but they will heal, hurt and fear will always be part of the journey but dear, so will love. As long as I take nothing for granted and keep that in mind, I’ll take the ‘missing’ as a by-product of care, love and a fulfilled life.

 

All my love,

 

Anna